Dress Progression... Fun!

First time I tried on the dress, in February or March 2011, I think. What a nice picture someone took, showcasing the dress size and everything! The zipper is crying. At least the lady didn't use those industrial clamps. Means I wasn't the biggest big girl to stroll in that day, I guess...

 At the end of the reception on the wedding day, 11-11-11. Or as some nerds call it, "The Day Skyrim Was Released"...

Now, I will not pretend that I'm not squeezed into the dress in the latter picture. I am. I can breathe, but just barely. And you can see some muffin-top of my back fat. But that baby zipped up, with a bit of effort. Maybe less effort if we all hadn't gotten our nails done.

Twenty pounds made a world of difference. From the scary 300 I started with, down to the 291 I started my blog with, down and up again to 284... It's scary to think I have so much more to lose. Especially when 20 lb doesn't seem like a whole lot to have lost. That's crazy! With most people, that's a sixth of their weight! That's a fourteenth of my weight! And now my daily quota of math has been reached. I'll kick this thing like a bad habit, though. Not dying is a significant goal of mine!

Bloodwork and the Numbers Game

I decided that waiting to do cholesterol bloodwork was a bad idea. Y'know-- since I'm sick, miserable and overweight NOW!

Since I was already in for a checkup (Yay! Insurance!) I had them draw blood for a full blood-analysis-doohickey. I get the results tomorrow. I will know how truly unhealthy I am in the morning and do a quick update here. The not-too-promising stats from today kind of nauseated me:

Height: 6'00" (Okay... I already knew this one!)
Weight: 284.4 lb (Hey! I was wearing clothes and shoes and carrying my cell phone...)
Body Mass Index: 38.6 (Morbidly obese, I think...)
Temperature: 97.7 (Not dead)
Blood Pressure: 139/106 (Dying a bit, due to stress at work or something else)
Pulse: 81 bpm (Not dead)

UPDATE: My in-home weigh-in right after the doctor and before I ate and in my drawas says 280. I'm gonna keep that one.

UPDATE AGAIN: 12/2/11: My in-home weigh-in after a day of swearing off Pepsi, caffeine, excess sugar, and sticking pretty closely to the Weight Watchers Simply Filling program (except for a small Wendy's chili and a Little Debbie brownie, which will be counted as weekly points deductions) is:

276 lb. point-something-I-forgot

Preliminary discussion:

1. I am VERY overweight, but for my height and bone structure, NP says my weight would probably be good at around 200 lb, which is my Major Goal One.

2. I am to monitor my blood pressure regularly and report back if it gets worse or doesn't significantly improve. (*sigh* Killing myself with food really sucks! This is the first time my blood pressure has registered that high at the doctor! I think I bragged before about having stable blood pressure and a healthy heart for a big 'un. Well, it's a slippery slope right now!)

3. Weight Watchers Simply Filling menu has been approved. Atkins has not been approved... But if I eat mostly Power Foods I'll be on Atkins! In short, I am to stop eating junk. With the NP's and doctor's stern faces firmly in mind.

4. I am also to exercise, no matter how cruddy it looks outside. In the best interests of not dying, I will make an earnest attempt. Cue Eye of the Tiger! This girl's gonna get movin'!

5. The Clincher: They force-scheduled me for my annual consultation with the doctor in 2 weeks, to officially check for improvements in my BP and stuff. You know what that means? A deadline! Two weeks to get somewhere or risk Doc's scary face!

Not REALLY scared of the guy, but his scary face has my best interests at heart. He would like to keep my business. I would like to live a longer, healthier life. There are mutually beneficial payouts to be had. Since my progress in weight loss has reversed, I think I'll start a NEW new week 1, in light of my mean-face-imposed deadline. Not that the week numbers really matter. Just helps me track things. But in honor of my umpteenth restart, I might as well. Tuesdays it is. :)

UPDATE-- BLOODWORK RESULTS:

Apparently, the numbers aren't worth posting. Because they're all within normal ranges except a couple that won't kill me. My bad cholesterol is only slightly elevated and not enough to warrant medical action. NP says to watch my fats and sodium intake. Which I'm doing. My calcium is a couple points below the expected range. Big whoop. I'm drinking fat free milk now, so that should fix that.

I feel silly for being slightly disappointed in the numbers. I mean, I don't have anything I can significantly reduce other than my weight, which is my only major risk factor for disease later on (according to the bloodwork numbers). But because of the blood pressure scare, I will be cutting out a lot of salt in my diet, which will help me shed water weight, anyway.

Someone close to me-- a relative-- was just diagnosed with diabetes. The kind that is controlled with pills "for now." I'm going to drag this person along on my Health Overhaul, hoping that significant improvements can be made there as well. This is another strong push to succeed. I guess this brings me back to my original point: I'm generally healthy for now. I just so happen to be overweight by 80 lb. I do NOT want an existing medical condition to force my weight loss. So here I go...

Cuddles,

Tamara

Week 16, 17, 18 & 19: One, Two, Skip A Few...

Quadruple Whammies! When I hit a rut, I really hit hard!

Week 16 was the week after the Halloween party. Didn't have company after Wednesday, and back to work that week. Good company still equals bad eating, though, for both Susan and myself. I laced my Power Foods with junk food and party leftovers and fast food.

Week 17 led up to my wedding, with a household shower and no hope of eating intelligently. Susan came back to be all Maid of Honor-y. :) The wedding went well, by the way. Only a few fat-tuck issues with the pictures. I'm a wife now, which is a weird feeling!

Week 18 was the week after my wedding, during which I subsisted solely on cheeseball and leftover red velvet wedding cake.

Week 19 is Thanksgiving week, during which I know I will eat heavily on three different days, with leftovers. I still want to try some of the Power Foods replacement meals for Thanksgiving. But poor Brandon wants "real" food. And he'll "waste away" on what I eat. :)

My weigh in will not happen until the end of Week 20. I know it's bad. I just can't do it this week.

So what's the plan? All joking aside... Well, first I briefly considered bulimia. Then I realized how hard of a time I have setting up routines, how much I hate to waste things, and how much I hate throwing up. Then I considered liposuction, zip-zap, all done. Then I realized I am essentially poor and that lipo is not a viable option at this time.

So I decided the following instead:

I'll give myself until Week 20 to eat bad-for-me stuff. That's next Monday. I will try to sneak in a few healthful meals between now and then, and try to lean toward the good for me stuff. Then on Monday morning, I'll weigh in. And probably cry. I'll dive into the Weight Watchers Power Foods Simply Filling program again. It'll be all damage control until Christmas, when I'll pare down my holiday food intake even more, perhaps not even breaking the program this time. Then it's more damage control until the New Year.

At that time, I'll take my progress (or lack thereof) to the doctor and get a full cholesterol and bloodwork profile made. We'll discuss what I'm trying and what's working or not, and see what he can do for me in the way of support or maybe even meds, short of stapling my stomach. It'll be interesting to see where this goes...

And then, depending on the outcome and suggestions that arise from that, I'm going to do something drastic. I'll do a fast of some type. Perhaps that nasty juice fast I tried. Depends on my activity level at the time. I'll do it for a week, two weeks, a month... However long it takes to get my body ready to process fat, and how long it takes me to get over the silly cravings of addiction. Don't worry, I said "drastic", not "stupid." I'll not do anything that would hurt me more than help.

See you at the end of Week 20!

Cuddles,

Tamara